Misplaced Compassion

I wrote this while I was on lunch today at work. I mainly wrote it for myself , so I could sort through some of my own thoughts, wrestling with some bad relationship history, trying to find ways to rule over my sin and foster a Christ-like love for my fellow human beings. Read it at your own peril...and if you suffered through this whole thing, please offer any suggestions you have in the comments.

I just had compassion for a lady bug who hitched a ride in my lunch. I shook it off onto the carpet by my office chair, but when I tried to kick it out of the way, I injured her. I felt bad. I didn't mean to hurt her. Why do I feel compassion for a bug right now? (Why am I calling it "her"?) I have smashed plenty of bugs in the course of my life. Is it because I have control over it? ...maybe not...bosses abuse employees, mothers violate their children's rights. No, it's not control.

I have compassion with people and things that I have a connection or a relationship. 

What was the connection? She was from my home? This could possibly have been the start, but when I looked down, I was aware that this was a creature that God has placed under me, so that I could manage it. I did something I did not intend. I injured her. I stopped to wonder if bugs feel pain? Then I felt really bad, and wanted to correct the situation. I do realize that it is just a bug with no eternal soul, so I decided to put it out of it's (assumed) misery. I stepped on it, just like I had hundreds of other bugs, but I still felt bad. I let myself feel what it felt, and so I felt a little of the death it died.

Why is it so hard for me to have compassion on other human beings? Why is it so difficult to put myself in their place? Is it because when God tells me, "Rule over...every living creature" I feel important, empowered, in control (reaction of my sinful pride), and when God tells me, "Love your neighbor as yourself" I feel weak, lowly, servitude? Both are reactions of my sinful pride, while my new man is trying to do what's right. One is joyful, the other is forced. Well, I guess the first one is not really joyful either. I don't like to work and I do get upset with our dog. I guess I just have a general lack of compassion. I find rude actions to be funny. But still, I did just have compassion on a bug.

God must be working. 

So why wouldn't I treat the crown of God's creation with greater compassion than lesser created things? Is it because I think they should know better? Is it because I think I am better?

Pride is the death of compassion. 

Most people are more compassionate with animals than with people. Is this just evidence of the pride of the human race? Then, in like measure, but at a different level, most people give more grace to their own pets than someone else's pets. Like we give our leadership results grace, while judging harshly the decision making ability of others (like the parable of the unmerciful servant). Sounds like an accusation against Christians, but these are rather worldly applications where I see complete atheists making similar harsh judgments.

Some of the best advice for canvassing, I got from my wife, who entrenches herself in God's word, "Love them so much that you would want to spend eternity with them." That means developing an open relationship like the one I started with my wife 12 years ago. By the grace of God, we both went into our relationship thinking, "No pretending. I'm just going to be who I am, and if they don't like me, then we aren't meant for each other." We've been married 11 years now, and yes, it has required changes in who we are, so that we can serve our spouse. It didn't happen all at once, but our close relationship has required us to admit when we are wrong, confess our dark secrets, forgive each other, and reflect the love of Christ to each other. Not easy, but worth it.

I've realized that all relationships are similar. My wife and I tried to spend as much time together as possible. We clung to each other. You love someone by wanting to spend all kinds of time with them. Fun time, down time, work time; different activities, different moods, different challenges. It doesn't matter as long as you have that person.

God seeks you like this. 

He compares His relationship with you like the perfect marriage (at least from His end). Good thing marriage isn't 50/50, because I can't even offer 0.0001. He goes the 100%, he pursues us to the ends of the earth, he wants to be with us, God, the creator of heaven and earth, wants to hang-out with YOU. Crazy. He loves YOU, no matter what you did, are doing, or will do. That is a secure marriage...unless you run away with somebody else. Who else would be so great as to take the place of God? Maybe your spouse, children, parents, or even a car, a house, toys, money, work...well pretty much anything you see. What we see often distracts us from what we can't see, the source of all these physical blessings, God. That's why we need to read about what we can't see. God took the time to tell us about himself, using human authors. He revealed himself, and they wrote. God wants us to take Him at His word. Like every good Father, he wants our trust, no matter what He says to us, no matter what He asks us to do or not do. He loves us like a perfect parent, spouse, and sibling. If we trust this, things just seem to fall into place (even the rough times when we really have to dig into His word and seek His will). If we doubt him, we drive a wedge in our relationship, and we lose a piece of His blessing. Just like a good father will withhold some special gifts from his children when he perceives that they have gotten greedy. He will help them learn to give to others first, before showering them with more blessings. We might be upset that God gave us an apple instead of the bucket of candy, but God knows how we work and what's best for us. Trust him. I'm not saying that all "misfortune" is due to lacking spiritual strength. God also lets his children shine as bright examples when we place our trust in him, even when all earthly things fade away. It's always for our good or the good of those around us. He also promises that we will not lose our reward for aiding God's purpose. Find joy in your service.

So...I started by talking about compassion. Where does this fit in? 

Wouldn't compassion naturally flow from this thought process? God loves you and has compassion on you. He seeks a relationship with you that is heavily steeped in compassion (we are completely lost sinners without His grace). Again, it goes back to my sinful nature, my pride gets in the way, my pride makes me forget, my pride focuses on the works of my hands, my accomplishments. But my pride either leads to arrogance or depression. When we can't see God, then there is only other people to compare ourselves with, and since we all have strengths and weaknesses, we either see ourselves as better or worse, and without a larger goal in mind, we shortsightedly focus on the things we see, the tasks at hand, and judge. It's not until we compare ourselves to a righteous God, that we fully realize our true condition, and it's not until we read the testimonies about Jesus, and the promises in the Old Testament that we realize that God loves us anyway. He still wants to be married to us despite everything that we've done to Him, despite all the other guys and girls we've slept with. He still seeks us out, through the work of his son, Jesus, our brother and Lord, to keep us in the family for ever.

Love your brothers and sisters for ever, just as God loves you.

What Should We Do?

I went through a lot of effort to get a pro-life charity approved for the Wisconsin State Employee Combined Campaign (SECC), also known as Partners in Giving in Dane County.

I advertised the pro-life organization, Heartbeat International, on the wall just outside my cubicle for about two weeks before I was asked to take it down. Someone thought that "it might be crossing the line."

There are 4 abortion supporter/providers already receiving funds from this workplace giving campaign. In a recent advertisement email for the campaign, a charity was highlighted that promotes LGTB lifestyle, something which I think is very detrimental to a person's well-being.

Why are Christians always silenced?

The comment about my pro-life promotion was made anonymously to my supervisor. This was my email reply back to my supervisor.

I took down the charity promotion, but I feel compelled to have a conversation with whoever thought it might be crossing the line. I don’t want to cause offense, but also don’t want a good cause to be hushed. I’m reminded of a quote attributed to Edmond Burke, “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” I don’t want to be that guy either, it would go against my conscience. If you could please encourage the person to come talk with me directly about it, that would be great. If they agree to have it up in some other capacity, would that be OK by you?

My supervisor said she passed along my request...that was 2 weeks ago, and still no one has had the guts to talk with me...disappointing.

What should I do? Hang it back up? They couldn't have been that offended if they can't even talk with me.

Should I be silent on such a critical issue?

Therefore do not let what you know is good be spoken of as evil. - Romans 14:16

Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. - Proverbs 31:8

Please help me break the silence with a positive out-pour of your God-given generosity.

If you are a UW or state employee, you can still give to this charity (#3044) on November 30.
Just go to https://www.givingnexus.org/_partnersingiving/ 
Note the different login instructions for UW and state employees.

The main page is here:  www.giving.wi.gov

Silly Dog

So our dog thinks she's entitled to have certain things or areas around our yard. She keeps trying to claim parts of our property for herself. I have to take them away or show dominance in those areas to teach her it's all mine. She would have access to everything if she didn't get possessive. We are choosing to love her, even through these trials, and she is becoming a good dog. When she loves us more than the things, she will have more than she wants. How sin turns us into brute animals.

Do not be like the horse or the mule, which have no understanding but must be controlled by bit and bridle or they will not come to you. - Psalm 32:9

Psalm 32 is a good chapter for those of us who wrestle with sin just as King David did. This penitential Psalm was most likely written after his affair with Bathsheba, the mother of Solomon who was in the line of our Savior. We have everlasting forgiveness for all our sins. Why be controlled by sin any longer?

I don't want to be like our Silly Dog, trying to grab little insignificant portions of God's creation for myself. My loving God wants to bless me beyond my imagination, first and foremost spiritually. I want to receive the full blessing of my God, which he has in store for me, to use for His kingdom.

God, please help me understand my role as your servant. Humble me that I may work faithfully for you, and use all the bounty of creation that you have entrusted to me for your good purpose. Help me watch and pray, that I do not fall into temptation. Amen.

Many are the woes of the wicked, but the Lord’s unfailing love surrounds the one who trusts in him. Rejoice in the Lord and be glad, you righteous; sing, all you who are upright in heart! - Psalm 32:10-11

Do what you were Made to Do

But who are you, a human being, to talk back to God? “Shall what is formed say to the one who formed it, ‘Why did you make me like this?’” Does not the potter have the right to make out of the same lump of clay some pottery for special purposes and some for common use? - Romans 9:20-21

My wife told me these words as a strong rebuke, and boy, did I need it. I was complaining, feeling dumb and worthless. Pitying our state and my hopeless financial situation. Then wham! Smack me over the head with God's word, and I have clarifying purpose.

I had spent $75 to have a repair man tell me how to turn on my furnace. I thought I was going to save big bucks, and finally get to take advantage of one of those warranties that always seem to work out great for other people. After some futzing around, we figured out I had it backward which thermostat controlled the natural gas heat and which thermostat controlled the wood burner heat. Great! Wasting God's money again...or so I thought.

It took me about 10 minutes to emotionally pull myself back together after realizing my mistake. The repair man gave me his sympathies, but also needed to collect the copay associated with the warranty service call. I took the opportunity to ask him some more questions about the wood burner system.

As he was processing my payment, he asked me how I liked the area. I initially just said, "Good. We like it out here." Then I had an overwhelming urge to add something about our church being right across the street. I didn't know if it really fit into the conversation, but I couldn't think of anything else to say. So at the Spirit's prompting, I said it. Well, it turned out that he had just gone to church for the first time in 10 years the previous Thursday. His daughter is in catechism classes and his wife had been on him to go to church. He also recounted his overseas experience as he worked diligently to provide for his family during hard economic times.

When he left, that's when the complaining started, and my wife had to step in. Then His purpose for me was clear.

When I got the confirmation email of my payment, I took the opportunity to encourage him in his faith life. This, is what I was called to do. Humbling, but I think it was worth the $75. God even uses my faults for His purpose. May God always use me as He sees fit.

I tell you, use worldly wealth to gain friends for yourselves, so that when it is gone, you will be welcomed into eternal dwellings. -Luke 16:9

I know I've got a pessimistic Baruch side of me that I need to keep in check. God led me to Jeremiah 45 one morning shortly after the furnace warranty call. Through Jeremiah, God is proclaiming destruction on his faithless people. God is tearing down the kingdom of Judah, so he can eventually build it up again in His Name. Baruch is bemoaning how he is never going to get anywhere in this life. All hope of success is shattered. But God shows him tremendous mercy by protecting his life. I hope that this emboldened him to serve God more faithfully.

When Baruch son of Neriah wrote on a scroll the words Jeremiah the prophet dictated in the fourth year of Jehoiakim son of Josiah king of Judah, Jeremiah said this to Baruch: “This is what the Lord, the God of Israel, says to you, Baruch: You said, ‘Woe to me! The Lord has added sorrow to my pain; I am worn out with groaning and find no rest.’ But the Lord has told me to say to you, ‘This is what the Lord says: I will overthrow what I have built and uproot what I have planted, throughout the earth. Should you then seek great things for yourself? Do not seek them. For I will bring disaster on all people, declares the Lord, but wherever you go I will let you escape with your life.’”

Should I seek great things? I am only a servant.
Through this rough world, please Lord, let me escape with my life. You are a God of great mercy for I deserve far worse. Please Lord, extend my stay on this earth that I may do my duty.

"So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, ‘We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.’" -Luke 17:10

Goose Greed

So these geese have been landing in the corn field by our house for quite some time. I don't hunt geese, so it finally occurred to me to offer the hunting location to other hunters I know from church. Great intention.

One of my hunting friends got really excited, and said, "We totally have to do this." Well, I hadn't thought about me doing the hunting, but since I have goose hunted in the past, it wasn't outside the realm of possibility.

I decided to give it a go.

I got permission from the neighbor that weekend, and we started scheduling a time to hunt that worked for me and two friends. I was getting anxious, eyeing up those geese just sitting in the field. I was running calculations of how many I would have to shoot in order to offset the cost of the license (crazy expensive for some reason) and cost of ammunition (also not cheap). I was nervous that something would happen to screw up this awesome opportunity.

Then, it happened.

We scheduled a hunt for Sunday afternoon. That Saturday morning I woke up to gun shots.

What?! The neighbor didn't say anything about other goose hunters!

I threw on some clothes and walked quickly out to the back yard just in time to see the group of five guys fill their goose limit. I walked out to them, thinking, "What are they doing here? Do they have permission? Those are my geese! I can't believe this. I finally catch a break (a lot of worrying about if this was the right house to buy), and then it's taken away! Calm down. There is probably a good reason why they are here. I should be happy for them. There are lots of other geese out there. God can still bless me."

Well, they did have permission. They scouted the area, asked permission the Tuesday after I had asked, and they had their limit. They offered for me to hop in a blind right then, but I had procrastinated getting my licence until that afternoon (it took 45 minutes to get the licence and then at the end they overcharged me). We exchanged numbers in case we would want to coordinate a combined hunt. I told them when we were planning to get out, and they said they would be back Sunday morning. That wouldn't work for us, because we would want to go to church instead.

The Lord will provide, right? Yes...but not in the way that I want.

Sunday afternoon was a bust. We saw three smaller flocks, but none would get close enough.

I was quite distraught Sunday evening. I felt like throwing a tantrum. God said, "No." Why? So I could teach my children? Probably, but teach them what? I obviously still have to learn the lesson.

I ended up sharing my frustrations with my oldest daughter.

I could not get to sleep Sunday night, it was really bothering me. I got out of bed, grabbed my Bible and sat down at the computer. I hashed out a lot of stuff as you can see.

These are the highlights:

• Hunting should not be a priority for me. It never works to save us money, and this was my primary motivator.
• If I do hunt it will be to develop relationships with other guys, and I will be OK with getting nothing.
• I can't do everything. I first need to take care of what God has given me (family, housework, etc.).
• I already have tremendous blessings (my wife slept on the floor next to the computer because she wanted to support me, but didn't know how. Just her being there really meant a lot!)
• Always make time for God's word (I took this time to look up a question I had earlier in the week).

But the biggest one was:

• I did not begin this task with prayer!

I was reminded of Proverbs 16:25 "There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death." It was a no brainer for me to go shoot those geese, but it was for selfish gain, the essence of my sinful nature.

I had the wrong focus the whole time, even though I was telling myself all the right reasons in my head. My emotions tipped me off that something wasn't right. I needed to seek the truth. I needed to read God's word, and pray for His good will to be accomplished.

I did decide to hunt Tuesday morning with the guys, this time, for the right reasons. The night before, I found this on my pillow:

My daughter was looking at the situation from a more positive perspective.

Proverbs 16:3 "Commit to the Lord whatever you do,
    and he will establish your plans.

It's interesting that God lead us both to a verse in Proverbs 16. God is good.

We did get two geese on Tuesday, so we were able to praise God for prayers answered. He also blessed our fellowship together as we talked about our lives. It was a good day.

This past Sunday, the sermon was titled "Do you Really Want to be Rich?" based on Jesus' conversation with the rich young man in Mark 10. It was a really good sermon (as usual), but right as Pastor said, "What's really first?" I saw a flock of geese fly right passed the stained glass window directly behind Pastor.

Oh, God! Dagger to the heart! But it was good to be reminded again. I was trying to grab at too much, and not trusting Him to provide my daily bread. I keep trying to store up bread, invest bread, and do more to get more bread. Then it seems to mold in storage, dissolve in my hands, and be only a mirage.

Lord, please simply make me a willing servant, and grant me daily bread to sustain me.

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

Marriage Enrichment

How much do you spend on developing your children? School, sports, music, books, time.

How much do you spend developing your marriage?

In many ways, our marriage is the foundation of our children's lives.

My wife and I are sold on the annual Marriage Enrichment weekend that is offered through our synod of churches. We attended this event last year, and want to continue to attend every year. Taking a whole weekend and dedicating it to our relationship and our vow to God. The second day was really what sold us We had stopped thinking about preparing the kids and dropping them off; and we hadn't yet started thinking about packing up our stuff and children, and heading back home. We could focus on each other, clear up some lingering issues, and enjoy the company. The second day is also when you get to go out on a romantic date night. It always helps to throw some romance in there when you're working on your relationship.

Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love - Ecclesiastes 9:9a

The information was very practical, and we've used it since. We weren't overloaded with information, and we were given time to practice right there.We attended the Simply Marriage retreat which included:

• overcoming frustration, 
• appreciating incompatibility, 
• breaking patterns that destroy oneness, 
• using words that work, and
• growing more intimate.

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. - Ephesians 5:21

The fellowship of joining with married couples from a wide range of backgrounds was encouraging in itself. Marriage is great! And it was awesome to share this joy with others who could really relate. And yeah, the sex is great too. More married couples need to make this known. The single "free sex" life is promoted so much in our society. But being single is more often a self-indulgent drag that leaves you wondering if anyone really loves you. In marriage we are truly free to use God's gift of sex to the fullest. And it is AWESOME!

He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord. - Proverbs 18:22

I'm writing this now, because just last weekend our church hosted a Marriage Enrichment Day which used some of the same materials from the Simply Marriage retreat. Even though we had heard the material before, it was awesome. Katrina and I actually addressed new problems that had crept into our relationship in the past 8 months, go figure! And again, the fellowship of other married couples was fortifying as we worked through what God wants for us in our married lives. We had 25 couples attend in a church of around 250 members! I have great hope for the future of these marriages.

A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. - Ecclesiastes 4:12b

God is doing some amazing things. Marriage enrichment opportunities seem to be popping up everywhere now. Maybe we finally realized that the ultimate defense of traditional marriage is making sure our marriage is what God intended it to be. Here are some of the marriage enrichment events that I have come across:

• Marriage Enrichment weekend (different weekends and different locations around the US)
• Three Strands (coming up soon Nov. 7th)
• Monthly Date Nights (St. Andrew in Middleton)
• Marriage Enrichment Day (Resurrection in Verona, and other WELS churches are recirculating the materials from the Marriage Enrichment weekends) 

The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”...and he brought her to the man. - Genesis 2:18, 22

Day of Remembrance

September 12th was the National Day of Remembrance for Aborted Children. Our family went to Resurrection Cemetery on Regent Street in Madison where there is a memorial to the unborn children lost to abortion. Perhaps a more moving ceremony would be at Holy Cross Cemetery in Milwaukee, the grave site of 1,286 aborted children. But I wanted to keep this private for our family, and meaningful for our children. We dressed for a funeral and prepped the kids. It's always so tough for me to explain abortion to our 5-year-old boys. They keep on asking what abortion means, like they must have misunderstood our previous explanations, like the explanation is so wrong that Dad and Mom must not be saying what I think they're saying.

I was at the public hearing for assembly bill 310, which would prevent Planned Parenthood from being the sole recipient for all of Wisconsin's Title X healthcare funding. I left shortly after a strongly opposed Democrat was offended that the word "kill" be used in conjunction with abortion. I wonder what her definition would be if she had to explain abortion to kindergartners.

My definition to the boys: Abortion is when a mommy doesn't want the child in her tummy, so she has her child killed.

And I need to quickly follow this up with, "This is wrong. It is against God's will, against the 5th Commandment, but our government lets women do this. This is why we help."

We opened with hymn 282 "Lord, Open Now My Heart to Hear" to prepare us to hear God's words to us.
We also sang hymn 378 "All Mankind Fell in Adam's Fall" to keep us humble, reminding us that we are all lost without Christ.

I then read the following passages with summaries:
Genesis 1:26-28 We are the crown of creation made in the image of God.
Psalm 93 God is eternal.
Ecclesiastes 3:11-17 We have eternal souls. We will also be judged for what we've done.
Exodus 20:13 God tells us not to kill another human being.
Deuteronomy 28: 11,18 Blesses and curses for God's people, Israel, which include your offspring. When society loses God's truth, our children are hurt in the worst ways.
Judges 13:7 Samson was set apart in his mother's womb. He was fulfilling God's purpose before birth.
Psalm 139:13-24 David knew God watched over him in the womb. He also asks God to search him and lead him to eternal life. My wife commented on what a great prayer for us to pray.
Job 10:8-12 Job also confesses how God formed him in the womb.
Psalm 127:3 Children are an awesome blessing.

Intermission: The kids noticed that the memorial had grass on it from the mower, so they took the time to clean off the memorial. We praised them for honoring these lost children by cleaning their memorial.

Since we know these truths of God, what are we to do?
Proverbs 31:8-9 Speak up and defend their cause.
Matthew 7:12 Treat them like we would want to be treated.
Isaiah 1:13-20 with emphasis on verse 17 The Israelites were still going to church, but then they did whatever they wanted during the week. God was disgusted with their false worship, and just wanted them to live their faith.

There were several other questions the kids had has we read God's word. I don't remember all of it (some of you are thinking, "Good thing. This is a very boring post.")

Then we sang the following hymns:
401 "Your Works, Not Mine, O Christ"
431 "I Walk in Danger All the Way"
462 "Oh, that the Lord Would Guide My Ways"
477 "What is the World to Me"
We prayed hymn 522 "Grant Peace, We Pray, in Mercy, Lord"
And sang 579 "Lift High the Cross" to close.

It was good for our family. This is the world we live in. Why distract our children from reality? God calls each of us to work for His purpose. That includes our children.

May God bless your family.