Optimism or Realism

Aren't we all realists? It just depends on our view of reality. Some are right and some are wrong. “Optimist” and “Pessimist” are labels we usually assign to others that we are comparing to ourselves, and we use our “realism” as the measuring stick. Even if you think of yourself as a positive person, you don't go beyond your view of reality.

I've read a lot of authors who say, “Be optimistic and you will be successful!” I've found that when I try to be optimistic, I lie to myself. I seem to be trying to believe something that isn't realistic, and therefore untrue, all because I want it to be different. Sometimes this forced optimism is motivated by an improved perception of myself, sometimes motivated by a desire for success, sometimes motivated by my desire to be more Christ-like. But I find myself struggling against “reality.” I’m trying to believe a lie. I’m trying to force a more positive view of the real world. Even if I exercise my creative powers to come up with positive comments to say and compliments to give, I find my mind whispering “Yeah, but…” 

Other books have told me, “Feed the positive voice and drown out the negative voice.” Basically change your subconscious programming, but when I try to rewrite my own view of the world, I lose a little bit of myself and become someone else that I have made up in my mind. I know it’s not me, because I can analyze both people. If I set up an ideal person or image that I want to change myself into, it leads to lots of frustration. First, I’m trying to be something I know I currently am not. Second, I will never flawlessly follow my ideal image (nobody is perfect). So now I've got low self-esteem because I want success, so I try to be the ideal optimist, and I fail to either follow my ideal or I feel fake when dealing with other people. So what’s the answer? 

I want success => I try to be optimistic => I don’t believe myself => I feel fake, and falter => I motivate myself, because I want success => ???

The books say, “You've got to love the process.” Love the process? Like an abused woman staying with her abusive man? The books say, “Hold a dream close in mind.” Hold the carrot in front of the mule. Do the painful work to get what you want. Of course we don’t know what something is truly like until we get it. There may be extreme disappointment if you have sacrificed your blood, sweat, and tears for something of little lasting worth. The dream is whatever you want. It might be good, but it usually isn't. I always want laziness and selfishness. You say, “Well, of course those aren't good. You have to dream of good things.” But you would be surprised how many things fit into these categories. What’s your motive? Don’t be so sure. 

Even a motivation to be more Christ-like can be walking down the path of Pharisees. A moralistic self-righteousness appears in us, putting ourselves on a pedestal and looking down at others who don’t follow the rules like we do. The real motivation is to pat ourselves on the back and say to God, “Don’t worry, I got this whole sanctification thing. I’ll take it from here.” Foolishness.

The only real answer is to find true reality. When you find true reality you don’t have to try to be something different than who you are. You just change naturally to align yourself with reality. It doesn't make sense to oppose reality. You just find yourself running in circles.

Welcome to reality. Not my reality, true reality, revealed only through God’s word.

We are not perfect. None of us. You may have guessed this one already.

God demands perfection. We cannot enter God’s presence with even one wrong thought. We die because we are not perfect.

God sent his son to be perfection for us. Jesus suffered hell on earth so we could spend an eternity in heaven.

We believe in Jesus as our savior through faith, which is given to us by God, the Holy Spirit. We cannot approach God on our own, because of our imperfection, so God comes to us, calling each one of us to repentance. We confess that Jesus is Lord by the power of the Holy Spirit. Now God says to us, “I have bought you back from death. I have set you apart. I give you my power, my knowledge, my love. You follow my will. You are my child.” Notice that He does not say, “Now you can try to follow my will. You can try to be my child if you do everything right. I can set you apart if you are good enough. You should do everything I ask you to do.” We will do it, because the work is done. We are confident in Gods’ love and mercy not because we always ask ourselves, “What would Jesus do?” but because we always ask ourselves, “What has Jesus done?” We remind ourselves daily that “It is finished.” and we are God’s children. He is our Father. We ARE different, because that is how He made us. Be free to be yourself, God’s redeemed child. We pray to God and read His word that He has given to us. This communication is the focal point of our relationship.

God constantly watches out for his children. He gives us exactly what we need. He gives us many blessings we can’t possibly count. He gives us opportunities to show love to others. He gives us suffering when we need our faith strengthened or when others need to see our strong faith. Everything is for our benefit. He promises to bless us whichever direction we chose to travel. It will all be for our good, even if it looks like a u-turn. Trust him.
That’s reality. 

Be a realist.

I am a success through Jesus => I trust God’s plan for me => I believe God works for my good => I am motivated by God’s love and mercy to be different