A Prayer for Politics

Praying for politics? What? A true Christian is above politics. Well...yes and no.

Politics is usually associated with very negative topics and corrupt practices. This is evidence of our desperate need. What has happened to America?

It is in our nature to polarize, struggling for dominance, but it is God's nature to unite through humble service.

Those in power fight to have more power. Just look at the Jews of the New Testament:
Pharisees vs. Sadducees => the people needed Jesus

And now in America:
Republican vs. Democrat => the people need Christians

Eventually people get sick of the battle between the earthly powers that be. They get sick of the battle even sooner if their is a constant compromise on the table that is logical to the common person, a better way that is agreed to by the majority. We get sick of power-grab decisions by our leaders (that is...if we are aware of them).

Why do Christ and Christians always seem to stand in the gap? Maybe because we are in the gap, between heaven and hell. Why are we always voting for the lesser evil? Maybe because God teaches us what is right and wrong (and if we are honest, we will admit that we are wrong, and God is right).

What if Christians displayed the proper intertwining relationship of Truth and Love?

This is an interesting cycle of human progress or decline. I was originally thinking about titling this post, "Why the two party system must fail." But then I decided that was too "political."

Our "government of the people, by the people, for the people" needs Christian leaders, so it will not perish from the earth. We need Christians like Jesus (as the name implies), not looking to grab power, but to serve their fellow human beings, their fellow citizens.

If you are a faithful Christian, please consider a career in politics. The future of our nation depends on you. God blesses those who seek His face; and a nation with godly rulers is blessed.

Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord, the people he chose for his inheritance.- Psalm 33:12

Not looking for a new career? Guess who needs to vote for these brave Christian leaders? That's right, Christians! Don't see many Christians around? Share the love of God with them! Our God is gracious to all, even to wayward nations who repent.

Personally, I will encourage you to let God's word guide your vote. Look beyond all the earthly issues, straight to the spiritual issues. And regardless to whatever a candidate says, they will bring their beliefs into office. We make decisions based on our beliefs; if you make decisions against your beliefs, you lack integrity. Vote for faithful Christians who stand on God's word and fight for God's will.

This was God's direction for the distant-future king of his people, which is still a good standard for our representatives:

When he takes the throne of his kingdom, he is to write for himself on a scroll a copy of this law, taken from that of the Levitical priests. It is to be with him, and he is to read it all the days of his life so that he may learn to revere the Lord his God and follow carefully all the words of this law and these decrees and not consider himself better than his fellow Israelites and turn from the law to the right or to the left. Then he and his descendants will reign a long time over his kingdom in Israel. -Deuteronomy 17:18-20

The best representative will be one who studies scripture with a humble heart. God, please send us such representatives!

Therefore, you kings, be wise; be warned, you rulers of the earth. Serve the Lord with fear and celebrate his rule with trembling. Kiss his son, or he will be angry and your way will lead to your destruction, for his wrath can flare up in a moment. Blessed are all who take refuge in him. - Psalm 2:10-12

Rulers serve the Lord or come to ruin. So the ruler goes, the nation follows. God, please send us a ruler who reveres your name!

Please use me to lead and elect according to your will. Amen.

Misplaced Compassion

I wrote this while I was on lunch today at work. I mainly wrote it for myself , so I could sort through some of my own thoughts, wrestling with some bad relationship history, trying to find ways to rule over my sin and foster a Christ-like love for my fellow human beings. Read it at your own peril...and if you suffered through this whole thing, please offer any suggestions you have in the comments.

I just had compassion for a lady bug who hitched a ride in my lunch. I shook it off onto the carpet by my office chair, but when I tried to kick it out of the way, I injured her. I felt bad. I didn't mean to hurt her. Why do I feel compassion for a bug right now? (Why am I calling it "her"?) I have smashed plenty of bugs in the course of my life. Is it because I have control over it? ...maybe not...bosses abuse employees, mothers violate their children's rights. No, it's not control.

I have compassion with people and things that I have a connection or a relationship. 

What was the connection? She was from my home? This could possibly have been the start, but when I looked down, I was aware that this was a creature that God has placed under me, so that I could manage it. I did something I did not intend. I injured her. I stopped to wonder if bugs feel pain? Then I felt really bad, and wanted to correct the situation. I do realize that it is just a bug with no eternal soul, so I decided to put it out of it's (assumed) misery. I stepped on it, just like I had hundreds of other bugs, but I still felt bad. I let myself feel what it felt, and so I felt a little of the death it died.

Why is it so hard for me to have compassion on other human beings? Why is it so difficult to put myself in their place? Is it because when God tells me, "Rule over...every living creature" I feel important, empowered, in control (reaction of my sinful pride), and when God tells me, "Love your neighbor as yourself" I feel weak, lowly, servitude? Both are reactions of my sinful pride, while my new man is trying to do what's right. One is joyful, the other is forced. Well, I guess the first one is not really joyful either. I don't like to work and I do get upset with our dog. I guess I just have a general lack of compassion. I find rude actions to be funny. But still, I did just have compassion on a bug.

God must be working. 

So why wouldn't I treat the crown of God's creation with greater compassion than lesser created things? Is it because I think they should know better? Is it because I think I am better?

Pride is the death of compassion. 

Most people are more compassionate with animals than with people. Is this just evidence of the pride of the human race? Then, in like measure, but at a different level, most people give more grace to their own pets than someone else's pets. Like we give our leadership results grace, while judging harshly the decision making ability of others (like the parable of the unmerciful servant). Sounds like an accusation against Christians, but these are rather worldly applications where I see complete atheists making similar harsh judgments.

Some of the best advice for canvassing, I got from my wife, who entrenches herself in God's word, "Love them so much that you would want to spend eternity with them." That means developing an open relationship like the one I started with my wife 12 years ago. By the grace of God, we both went into our relationship thinking, "No pretending. I'm just going to be who I am, and if they don't like me, then we aren't meant for each other." We've been married 11 years now, and yes, it has required changes in who we are, so that we can serve our spouse. It didn't happen all at once, but our close relationship has required us to admit when we are wrong, confess our dark secrets, forgive each other, and reflect the love of Christ to each other. Not easy, but worth it.

I've realized that all relationships are similar. My wife and I tried to spend as much time together as possible. We clung to each other. You love someone by wanting to spend all kinds of time with them. Fun time, down time, work time; different activities, different moods, different challenges. It doesn't matter as long as you have that person.

God seeks you like this. 

He compares His relationship with you like the perfect marriage (at least from His end). Good thing marriage isn't 50/50, because I can't even offer 0.0001. He goes the 100%, he pursues us to the ends of the earth, he wants to be with us, God, the creator of heaven and earth, wants to hang-out with YOU. Crazy. He loves YOU, no matter what you did, are doing, or will do. That is a secure marriage...unless you run away with somebody else. Who else would be so great as to take the place of God? Maybe your spouse, children, parents, or even a car, a house, toys, money, work...well pretty much anything you see. What we see often distracts us from what we can't see, the source of all these physical blessings, God. That's why we need to read about what we can't see. God took the time to tell us about himself, using human authors. He revealed himself, and they wrote. God wants us to take Him at His word. Like every good Father, he wants our trust, no matter what He says to us, no matter what He asks us to do or not do. He loves us like a perfect parent, spouse, and sibling. If we trust this, things just seem to fall into place (even the rough times when we really have to dig into His word and seek His will). If we doubt him, we drive a wedge in our relationship, and we lose a piece of His blessing. Just like a good father will withhold some special gifts from his children when he perceives that they have gotten greedy. He will help them learn to give to others first, before showering them with more blessings. We might be upset that God gave us an apple instead of the bucket of candy, but God knows how we work and what's best for us. Trust him. I'm not saying that all "misfortune" is due to lacking spiritual strength. God also lets his children shine as bright examples when we place our trust in him, even when all earthly things fade away. It's always for our good or the good of those around us. He also promises that we will not lose our reward for aiding God's purpose. Find joy in your service.

So...I started by talking about compassion. Where does this fit in? 

Wouldn't compassion naturally flow from this thought process? God loves you and has compassion on you. He seeks a relationship with you that is heavily steeped in compassion (we are completely lost sinners without His grace). Again, it goes back to my sinful nature, my pride gets in the way, my pride makes me forget, my pride focuses on the works of my hands, my accomplishments. But my pride either leads to arrogance or depression. When we can't see God, then there is only other people to compare ourselves with, and since we all have strengths and weaknesses, we either see ourselves as better or worse, and without a larger goal in mind, we shortsightedly focus on the things we see, the tasks at hand, and judge. It's not until we compare ourselves to a righteous God, that we fully realize our true condition, and it's not until we read the testimonies about Jesus, and the promises in the Old Testament that we realize that God loves us anyway. He still wants to be married to us despite everything that we've done to Him, despite all the other guys and girls we've slept with. He still seeks us out, through the work of his son, Jesus, our brother and Lord, to keep us in the family for ever.

Love your brothers and sisters for ever, just as God loves you.

What Should We Do?

I went through a lot of effort to get a pro-life charity approved for the Wisconsin State Employee Combined Campaign (SECC), also known as Partners in Giving in Dane County.

I advertised the pro-life organization, Heartbeat International, on the wall just outside my cubicle for about two weeks before I was asked to take it down. Someone thought that "it might be crossing the line."

There are 4 abortion supporter/providers already receiving funds from this workplace giving campaign. In a recent advertisement email for the campaign, a charity was highlighted that promotes LGTB lifestyle, something which I think is very detrimental to a person's well-being.

Why are Christians always silenced?

The comment about my pro-life promotion was made anonymously to my supervisor. This was my email reply back to my supervisor.

I took down the charity promotion, but I feel compelled to have a conversation with whoever thought it might be crossing the line. I don’t want to cause offense, but also don’t want a good cause to be hushed. I’m reminded of a quote attributed to Edmond Burke, “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” I don’t want to be that guy either, it would go against my conscience. If you could please encourage the person to come talk with me directly about it, that would be great. If they agree to have it up in some other capacity, would that be OK by you?

My supervisor said she passed along my request...that was 2 weeks ago, and still no one has had the guts to talk with me...disappointing.

What should I do? Hang it back up? They couldn't have been that offended if they can't even talk with me.

Should I be silent on such a critical issue?

Therefore do not let what you know is good be spoken of as evil. - Romans 14:16

Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. - Proverbs 31:8

Please help me break the silence with a positive out-pour of your God-given generosity.

If you are a UW or state employee, you can still give to this charity (#3044) on November 30.
Just go to https://www.givingnexus.org/_partnersingiving/ 
Note the different login instructions for UW and state employees.

The main page is here:  www.giving.wi.gov

Silly Dog

So our dog thinks she's entitled to have certain things or areas around our yard. She keeps trying to claim parts of our property for herself. I have to take them away or show dominance in those areas to teach her it's all mine. She would have access to everything if she didn't get possessive. We are choosing to love her, even through these trials, and she is becoming a good dog. When she loves us more than the things, she will have more than she wants. How sin turns us into brute animals.

Do not be like the horse or the mule, which have no understanding but must be controlled by bit and bridle or they will not come to you. - Psalm 32:9

Psalm 32 is a good chapter for those of us who wrestle with sin just as King David did. This penitential Psalm was most likely written after his affair with Bathsheba, the mother of Solomon who was in the line of our Savior. We have everlasting forgiveness for all our sins. Why be controlled by sin any longer?

I don't want to be like our Silly Dog, trying to grab little insignificant portions of God's creation for myself. My loving God wants to bless me beyond my imagination, first and foremost spiritually. I want to receive the full blessing of my God, which he has in store for me, to use for His kingdom.

God, please help me understand my role as your servant. Humble me that I may work faithfully for you, and use all the bounty of creation that you have entrusted to me for your good purpose. Help me watch and pray, that I do not fall into temptation. Amen.

Many are the woes of the wicked, but the Lord’s unfailing love surrounds the one who trusts in him. Rejoice in the Lord and be glad, you righteous; sing, all you who are upright in heart! - Psalm 32:10-11

Do what you were Made to Do

But who are you, a human being, to talk back to God? “Shall what is formed say to the one who formed it, ‘Why did you make me like this?’” Does not the potter have the right to make out of the same lump of clay some pottery for special purposes and some for common use? - Romans 9:20-21

My wife told me these words as a strong rebuke, and boy, did I need it. I was complaining, feeling dumb and worthless. Pitying our state and my hopeless financial situation. Then wham! Smack me over the head with God's word, and I have clarifying purpose.

I had spent $75 to have a repair man tell me how to turn on my furnace. I thought I was going to save big bucks, and finally get to take advantage of one of those warranties that always seem to work out great for other people. After some futzing around, we figured out I had it backward which thermostat controlled the natural gas heat and which thermostat controlled the wood burner heat. Great! Wasting God's money again...or so I thought.

It took me about 10 minutes to emotionally pull myself back together after realizing my mistake. The repair man gave me his sympathies, but also needed to collect the copay associated with the warranty service call. I took the opportunity to ask him some more questions about the wood burner system.

As he was processing my payment, he asked me how I liked the area. I initially just said, "Good. We like it out here." Then I had an overwhelming urge to add something about our church being right across the street. I didn't know if it really fit into the conversation, but I couldn't think of anything else to say. So at the Spirit's prompting, I said it. Well, it turned out that he had just gone to church for the first time in 10 years the previous Thursday. His daughter is in catechism classes and his wife had been on him to go to church. He also recounted his overseas experience as he worked diligently to provide for his family during hard economic times.

When he left, that's when the complaining started, and my wife had to step in. Then His purpose for me was clear.

When I got the confirmation email of my payment, I took the opportunity to encourage him in his faith life. This, is what I was called to do. Humbling, but I think it was worth the $75. God even uses my faults for His purpose. May God always use me as He sees fit.

I tell you, use worldly wealth to gain friends for yourselves, so that when it is gone, you will be welcomed into eternal dwellings. -Luke 16:9

I know I've got a pessimistic Baruch side of me that I need to keep in check. God led me to Jeremiah 45 one morning shortly after the furnace warranty call. Through Jeremiah, God is proclaiming destruction on his faithless people. God is tearing down the kingdom of Judah, so he can eventually build it up again in His Name. Baruch is bemoaning how he is never going to get anywhere in this life. All hope of success is shattered. But God shows him tremendous mercy by protecting his life. I hope that this emboldened him to serve God more faithfully.

When Baruch son of Neriah wrote on a scroll the words Jeremiah the prophet dictated in the fourth year of Jehoiakim son of Josiah king of Judah, Jeremiah said this to Baruch: “This is what the Lord, the God of Israel, says to you, Baruch: You said, ‘Woe to me! The Lord has added sorrow to my pain; I am worn out with groaning and find no rest.’ But the Lord has told me to say to you, ‘This is what the Lord says: I will overthrow what I have built and uproot what I have planted, throughout the earth. Should you then seek great things for yourself? Do not seek them. For I will bring disaster on all people, declares the Lord, but wherever you go I will let you escape with your life.’”

Should I seek great things? I am only a servant.
Through this rough world, please Lord, let me escape with my life. You are a God of great mercy for I deserve far worse. Please Lord, extend my stay on this earth that I may do my duty.

"So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, ‘We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.’" -Luke 17:10

Goose Greed

So these geese have been landing in the corn field by our house for quite some time. I don't hunt geese, so it finally occurred to me to offer the hunting location to other hunters I know from church. Great intention.

One of my hunting friends got really excited, and said, "We totally have to do this." Well, I hadn't thought about me doing the hunting, but since I have goose hunted in the past, it wasn't outside the realm of possibility.

I decided to give it a go.

I got permission from the neighbor that weekend, and we started scheduling a time to hunt that worked for me and two friends. I was getting anxious, eyeing up those geese just sitting in the field. I was running calculations of how many I would have to shoot in order to offset the cost of the license (crazy expensive for some reason) and cost of ammunition (also not cheap). I was nervous that something would happen to screw up this awesome opportunity.

Then, it happened.

We scheduled a hunt for Sunday afternoon. That Saturday morning I woke up to gun shots.

What?! The neighbor didn't say anything about other goose hunters!

I threw on some clothes and walked quickly out to the back yard just in time to see the group of five guys fill their goose limit. I walked out to them, thinking, "What are they doing here? Do they have permission? Those are my geese! I can't believe this. I finally catch a break (a lot of worrying about if this was the right house to buy), and then it's taken away! Calm down. There is probably a good reason why they are here. I should be happy for them. There are lots of other geese out there. God can still bless me."

Well, they did have permission. They scouted the area, asked permission the Tuesday after I had asked, and they had their limit. They offered for me to hop in a blind right then, but I had procrastinated getting my licence until that afternoon (it took 45 minutes to get the licence and then at the end they overcharged me). We exchanged numbers in case we would want to coordinate a combined hunt. I told them when we were planning to get out, and they said they would be back Sunday morning. That wouldn't work for us, because we would want to go to church instead.

The Lord will provide, right? Yes...but not in the way that I want.

Sunday afternoon was a bust. We saw three smaller flocks, but none would get close enough.

I was quite distraught Sunday evening. I felt like throwing a tantrum. God said, "No." Why? So I could teach my children? Probably, but teach them what? I obviously still have to learn the lesson.

I ended up sharing my frustrations with my oldest daughter.

I could not get to sleep Sunday night, it was really bothering me. I got out of bed, grabbed my Bible and sat down at the computer. I hashed out a lot of stuff as you can see.

These are the highlights:

• Hunting should not be a priority for me. It never works to save us money, and this was my primary motivator.
• If I do hunt it will be to develop relationships with other guys, and I will be OK with getting nothing.
• I can't do everything. I first need to take care of what God has given me (family, housework, etc.).
• I already have tremendous blessings (my wife slept on the floor next to the computer because she wanted to support me, but didn't know how. Just her being there really meant a lot!)
• Always make time for God's word (I took this time to look up a question I had earlier in the week).

But the biggest one was:

• I did not begin this task with prayer!

I was reminded of Proverbs 16:25 "There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death." It was a no brainer for me to go shoot those geese, but it was for selfish gain, the essence of my sinful nature.

I had the wrong focus the whole time, even though I was telling myself all the right reasons in my head. My emotions tipped me off that something wasn't right. I needed to seek the truth. I needed to read God's word, and pray for His good will to be accomplished.

I did decide to hunt Tuesday morning with the guys, this time, for the right reasons. The night before, I found this on my pillow:

My daughter was looking at the situation from a more positive perspective.

Proverbs 16:3 "Commit to the Lord whatever you do,
    and he will establish your plans.

It's interesting that God lead us both to a verse in Proverbs 16. God is good.

We did get two geese on Tuesday, so we were able to praise God for prayers answered. He also blessed our fellowship together as we talked about our lives. It was a good day.

This past Sunday, the sermon was titled "Do you Really Want to be Rich?" based on Jesus' conversation with the rich young man in Mark 10. It was a really good sermon (as usual), but right as Pastor said, "What's really first?" I saw a flock of geese fly right passed the stained glass window directly behind Pastor.

Oh, God! Dagger to the heart! But it was good to be reminded again. I was trying to grab at too much, and not trusting Him to provide my daily bread. I keep trying to store up bread, invest bread, and do more to get more bread. Then it seems to mold in storage, dissolve in my hands, and be only a mirage.

Lord, please simply make me a willing servant, and grant me daily bread to sustain me.

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

Marriage Enrichment

How much do you spend on developing your children? School, sports, music, books, time.

How much do you spend developing your marriage?

In many ways, our marriage is the foundation of our children's lives.

My wife and I are sold on the annual Marriage Enrichment weekend that is offered through our synod of churches. We attended this event last year, and want to continue to attend every year. Taking a whole weekend and dedicating it to our relationship and our vow to God. The second day was really what sold us We had stopped thinking about preparing the kids and dropping them off; and we hadn't yet started thinking about packing up our stuff and children, and heading back home. We could focus on each other, clear up some lingering issues, and enjoy the company. The second day is also when you get to go out on a romantic date night. It always helps to throw some romance in there when you're working on your relationship.

Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love - Ecclesiastes 9:9a

The information was very practical, and we've used it since. We weren't overloaded with information, and we were given time to practice right there.We attended the Simply Marriage retreat which included:

• overcoming frustration, 
• appreciating incompatibility, 
• breaking patterns that destroy oneness, 
• using words that work, and
• growing more intimate.

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. - Ephesians 5:21

The fellowship of joining with married couples from a wide range of backgrounds was encouraging in itself. Marriage is great! And it was awesome to share this joy with others who could really relate. And yeah, the sex is great too. More married couples need to make this known. The single "free sex" life is promoted so much in our society. But being single is more often a self-indulgent drag that leaves you wondering if anyone really loves you. In marriage we are truly free to use God's gift of sex to the fullest. And it is AWESOME!

He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord. - Proverbs 18:22

I'm writing this now, because just last weekend our church hosted a Marriage Enrichment Day which used some of the same materials from the Simply Marriage retreat. Even though we had heard the material before, it was awesome. Katrina and I actually addressed new problems that had crept into our relationship in the past 8 months, go figure! And again, the fellowship of other married couples was fortifying as we worked through what God wants for us in our married lives. We had 25 couples attend in a church of around 250 members! I have great hope for the future of these marriages.

A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. - Ecclesiastes 4:12b

God is doing some amazing things. Marriage enrichment opportunities seem to be popping up everywhere now. Maybe we finally realized that the ultimate defense of traditional marriage is making sure our marriage is what God intended it to be. Here are some of the marriage enrichment events that I have come across:

• Marriage Enrichment weekend (different weekends and different locations around the US)
• Three Strands (coming up soon Nov. 7th)
• Monthly Date Nights (St. Andrew in Middleton)
• Marriage Enrichment Day (Resurrection in Verona, and other WELS churches are recirculating the materials from the Marriage Enrichment weekends) 

The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”...and he brought her to the man. - Genesis 2:18, 22

Day of Remembrance

September 12th was the National Day of Remembrance for Aborted Children. Our family went to Resurrection Cemetery on Regent Street in Madison where there is a memorial to the unborn children lost to abortion. Perhaps a more moving ceremony would be at Holy Cross Cemetery in Milwaukee, the grave site of 1,286 aborted children. But I wanted to keep this private for our family, and meaningful for our children. We dressed for a funeral and prepped the kids. It's always so tough for me to explain abortion to our 5-year-old boys. They keep on asking what abortion means, like they must have misunderstood our previous explanations, like the explanation is so wrong that Dad and Mom must not be saying what I think they're saying.

I was at the public hearing for assembly bill 310, which would prevent Planned Parenthood from being the sole recipient for all of Wisconsin's Title X healthcare funding. I left shortly after a strongly opposed Democrat was offended that the word "kill" be used in conjunction with abortion. I wonder what her definition would be if she had to explain abortion to kindergartners.

My definition to the boys: Abortion is when a mommy doesn't want the child in her tummy, so she has her child killed.

And I need to quickly follow this up with, "This is wrong. It is against God's will, against the 5th Commandment, but our government lets women do this. This is why we help."

We opened with hymn 282 "Lord, Open Now My Heart to Hear" to prepare us to hear God's words to us.
We also sang hymn 378 "All Mankind Fell in Adam's Fall" to keep us humble, reminding us that we are all lost without Christ.

I then read the following passages with summaries:
Genesis 1:26-28 We are the crown of creation made in the image of God.
Psalm 93 God is eternal.
Ecclesiastes 3:11-17 We have eternal souls. We will also be judged for what we've done.
Exodus 20:13 God tells us not to kill another human being.
Deuteronomy 28: 11,18 Blesses and curses for God's people, Israel, which include your offspring. When society loses God's truth, our children are hurt in the worst ways.
Judges 13:7 Samson was set apart in his mother's womb. He was fulfilling God's purpose before birth.
Psalm 139:13-24 David knew God watched over him in the womb. He also asks God to search him and lead him to eternal life. My wife commented on what a great prayer for us to pray.
Job 10:8-12 Job also confesses how God formed him in the womb.
Psalm 127:3 Children are an awesome blessing.

Intermission: The kids noticed that the memorial had grass on it from the mower, so they took the time to clean off the memorial. We praised them for honoring these lost children by cleaning their memorial.

Since we know these truths of God, what are we to do?
Proverbs 31:8-9 Speak up and defend their cause.
Matthew 7:12 Treat them like we would want to be treated.
Isaiah 1:13-20 with emphasis on verse 17 The Israelites were still going to church, but then they did whatever they wanted during the week. God was disgusted with their false worship, and just wanted them to live their faith.

There were several other questions the kids had has we read God's word. I don't remember all of it (some of you are thinking, "Good thing. This is a very boring post.")

Then we sang the following hymns:
401 "Your Works, Not Mine, O Christ"
431 "I Walk in Danger All the Way"
462 "Oh, that the Lord Would Guide My Ways"
477 "What is the World to Me"
We prayed hymn 522 "Grant Peace, We Pray, in Mercy, Lord"
And sang 579 "Lift High the Cross" to close.

It was good for our family. This is the world we live in. Why distract our children from reality? God calls each of us to work for His purpose. That includes our children.

May God bless your family.

What can I DO?!

I received this text from a friend of mine last week:

Hey Phil, how's life? Hope you're all well...I've been meaning to pick your brain about this Planned Parenthood exposing going on.
Mostly I'm tired of just commenting to or sharing other people's posts of outrage, or posting ones of my own, on social media. Spreading awareness like that feels empty. Do you have any thoughts about being more active about this? They're dissecting live babies, Phil! This is pissing me off and breaking my heart. These children need us to DO something for them.

This text ruined my safe little cocoon that I was weaving around myself to shut out the reality of the Planned Parenthood videos. I knew I would be sick if I saw them. I know enough about abortion already to be able to picture the horrific scenes that others have described. I tweeted a little and Google+ a couple articles. But now my friend woke me up to the opportunity I was missing to find passionate people that support life.

This is the email response I sent to my friend:

This is in response to your text: Do whatever you can, remembering God's promises to you. Don't distract yourself with things of less importance. Don't let the passion of injustice fade as is so easy to do in distracted America.

I don't know about you, but I'm going to go to counseling.

There is the pro-life egg challenge response: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bBlge4RvztM

More info at: http://www.holyhenhouse.com/

You can contact your representatives, asking to defund PP. I'll forward a separate email.

You can call WLFL and ask what they are doing right now to reach more women (you might want to specifically ask about the sticker shock campaign). 414-727-8176  

Or I have the power to put you on a committee right now. How many things do you want to do?

Your family can stand on the side of the road with a sign asking to take unwanted babies. The Life Chain is coming up on October 4th. http://www.nationallifechain.org/ http://www.milwaukeelifechain.org/

See what's going on...

Large Pro-life organizations:

Care Net

National Institute of Family and Life Advocates (NIFLA)

Heartbeat International

Personhood America

Wisc. Right to Life

Pro-life Events:

Life-a-Thon  (2 mi walk/ 5k run)

Evening for Life banquet

Soul Ride    (motorcycle ride)

Sanctity of Life Day

Wis. Right to Life Legislative Conference

Voting http://blog.wifamilyaction.com/ and http://www.nrlpac.org/endorse-states.htm

Life Chain http://www.milwaukeelifechain.org/

Then I forwarded him 3 emails:
1. from WLFL, calling for monthly donors.
2. from Wisconsin Family Action, urging contact with representatives to support pro-life bills.
3. from Time of Grace, showing that pain makes my sin uncomfortable.

I added a note of encouragement on the last email:
Pray that our society sees the pain that the sin of sexual immorality causes. Talk to your neighbors, and share the truth about God's word and the sanctity of human life. We have eternal souls! Most people don't know this! Go! Tell! (with gentleness and respect)

After sending these emails, I was pretty worked up myself. I was sick with grief and despair. I'm told exercise releases stress, so I took the elevator to the basement of my building and ran up the stairs to the penthouse level, all 9+ stories. Perhaps it was a bit too much stress for my body to relieve through exercise. My heart was racing in a way that was not good. My hands went a little cold. I know I shouldn't work my heart that much, but I just felt like DOING something.

I called my wife, but she didn't answer. I went down to the Employee Assistance Program director. She was out of the office, but I wondered how a secular liberal would handle a Christian grieving over the murder and dissection of unborn babies. I went to a fellow Christian co-worker, and asked if he wanted to take a walk (I didn't tell him I was in a cold sweat to pour out my soul to a fellow Christian). He was busy. I started back down the stairs, not really sure where I was going (I guess to take a walk).

At the 5th floor I almost broke down crying, and prayed, "Lord, God, help us! Please save them!" That felt good. God reminded me of his promise to work things out for good. He also said he punishes the children for the sins of the fathers (sin hurts future generations). I was also reminded that wicked people destroy each other. I made it outside, found a bench on the side of the road, and sat, and thought, and grieved silently.

Thankfully my wife called me back, and I was able to release a tide of frustration and sadness. She said something that really got to the heart of the matter. "You should pray that the supporters of abortion come to know Jesus as their savior." BAM! That's it! Share the good news. Anyone in God's word respects human life. Let Law and Gospel work in their hearts. Bring it back to them. Their incorrect views on life stem from an incorrect view of who God is, what he demands, and what he has done. Let our lives shine his truth into dark places.  

I hope you can find something in this smorgasbord of opportunities to relieve that gnawing drive to DO something. It is the Spirit of God calling you to action. See what's available, and let me know what other opportunities I missed.

But if you find yourself face to face with the opposite view, remember Law and Gospel for their soul. God will take care of the rest.

For I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God that brings salvation to everyone who believes. - Romans 1:16

Despair - Truth - Grace

I had a terrible dream last night. I was all alone, not physically, but emotionally. I was actually surrounded by a lot of people throughout the whole dream. I was trying to find a place to stay for my family. We were trying to get a hotel room, but there was a big event in the area that prevented us from getting one of the last six available rooms. One of my extended family members had gotten the last room so I had to sheepishly ask if we could stay with them. The dream then morphed into a pit of self-pity. 

We were in a large meeting area, a special ceremony was being held within our family. Each person was recognized and praised, but I was overlooked. People looked at me with disdain. They didn’t want to hear from me. I was reminded of all my failures of life, mainly relational (I am not good at conveying my thoughts in an un-argumentative fashion). I kept thinking, “Why are they hurting me so bad? How could I have ever hurt them this bad?”

I was reminded of my failures of performance. All the things I’ve tried, that didn’t pan out, that didn’t amount to much, that seemingly accomplished no good. I was reduced to a pouty child in the corner, playing with one of the gifts that was given to someone else. I was trying to figure out how it worked…really just trying to remove myself emotionally from the ego beat down. When a man came over and stopped me from playing with it, because I was being too loud. He stifled my cry for help, for some positive attention, and belittled me in the process. I felt like jumping out a window. “Maybe they’ll care then! When they see what they’ve lead me to do.” 

I awoke in this despair of heart like a weight on my chest, and a wall of tears held back before my eyes.

Why was I given this dream? Have I caused others to feel this way? At times, have I made my children feel like the child in the corner? I would never commit suicide…why was I compelled to jump? This is the Devil’s work! Accusing sinners of all their mistakes.

At this point I try to conclude my dream, to spin it in a positive light, trying to pull my emotions back from the dregs. With my conscious thoughts I prepared a speech to the people that had been so cold to me.

My first reaction is to condemn them and jump out the window…No, that will never do. I would be despairing and in the danger of hell, and the people that remained probably wouldn’t care. They would think the problem was resolved, the problem was removed. I realized that that option forgets that God still loves me, though the people around me and my thoughts lead me to doubt God could love me. It forgets that Christ saved me. It forgets that Christ saved them.

Their actions were not kind to me in the dream, but I recognized that I must have done something to offend each person. So my unlooked-for speech begins: “I’m sorry.” Then, I give apologies to each party that has specifically made a jab at me during the ceremony. “I know I am utterly hopeless on my own, but I still trust that God loves me, though your actions lead me to doubt this. I feel like jumping out a window, but God would not be happy with me taking my own life, and leaving you here. You can judge for yourselves if you have treated me fairly. If you have disciplined me with love, or if you have avoided me in scorn. If you have spoken rightly of me, or if you have conspired to mount accusations against me. God still has some use for me.”

Then, as I walk out of the hall, someone shouts, “No one cares!” with a half chuckle from the crowd.

I spin and shout, “May God hold you accountable for your words!”

(my subconscious kind of takes over here) 
At that, he begins to choke on something he was eating. My first instinct for a brief second is to let him die accursed. An enemy smote by God. But then I run over to him and give him the Heimlich. In dramatic fashion the room is hushed. 

I realize God has provided my perfect response to this accusing crowd: Love. They realized I am not trying to condemn them, but save them. I had saved the life of someone who I directly opposed, because my God compels me. I am not trying to use my words to tear down, but to bind up.

Maybe I need to work on better actions and less words.

With that insight I headed downstairs. I was still in a depressed mood from being beat down in my dream. I knew I needed to go to God’s word. 

Just an aside: I like to open up the bible and read the first section I see. I believe God is active in our lives, and nothing is by accident. I also know God’s word is living and active, sharper than any double edged sword. God uses events in my life and his word to surgically remove fear, doubt, and rebellion from my heart, mind, and soul. So I try not to let my own presumptions get in the way. 

This was feeling like more of a time to be in the New Testament, so I open more towards the back and landed in First Corinthians, chapter 15. God reminded me of the simple truth of the gospel. Christ saved me. Jesus lived; Jesus died; Jesus rose. Paul, arguably the most powerful tool used to spread God’s word after Christ, almost laments even being called an apostle because of his unworthy nature. The passage that really hit me, and obliterated my despair was verse 10. 

“But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect.”

Thank you LORD! 
Please equip me for your service. Heart, mind, and soul. Completely. Amen.

Not my god!

Intelligence is not my god! I will not feel ashamed for not knowing something. I will not be afraid to make mistakes. I will not worry about looking dumb. I will not rank other people's importance based on their knowledge or degrees or work performance. I will not place my own thoughts and ideas above God's word. I will not despair of my lack of understanding. Intelligence is not my god!

What do you struggle with placing before God? Share a comment about what is not your god. Write a little bit to explain what it means to divorce yourself from that god, and cling to the One true God. By the power of Christ our Lord.

"Hear O Israel: The LORD our God; the LORD is one." - Deuteronomy 6:4

Trust Me

It had been a long week and my kids have been real troopers as we work ravenously on our house to make it into move-in condition. The kids have been great helpers, tearing up carpeting, hauling bricks, painting, making supper, cleaning, ripping off wall paper, and mowing the lawn. I’m sure they could come up with quite a few more tasks I’ve asked them to complete.

Well, Thursday night this past week, pretty much every kid fell asleep in the car on the way back to our apartment after another late night. Now James, one of our 5-yr-old boys, has had a habit of crying and getting angry if you wake him up from a deep sleep. I can’t blame him. I was the same way. But I don’t tolerate his rude reaction. This Thursday night, again, I wanted to help him get to bed with minimal fuss. But I also prayed that God would give me patience and love.

James was in a deep sleep as usual. As I tried coaxing him out of the car, I though about the dialog we were having. Between the words God gave me and James' sleep-talk responses, I can see God doing this for us…

“James. Buddy. We’re home. Can you get up and turn towards me? I can carry you all the way to your bed.”

James gives an animal-like cry somewhere between the sound of a loud morning stretch and a groan.

“Hey Bud, turn towards me so I can lift you out.” (He was sitting in the middle seat)

Clutching the blanket that was wrapped around him, he shouts, “I can do it! I can turn it!”

I can tell he is not awake. His eyes are still shut. “Trust me, son. It’s Daddy. Trust me. I’ll take care of it. Let go. I can carry you.”

He clutched the blanket more firmly, trying to “turn it” himself, misunderstanding my request. “I can do it!” he yells again in his sleep.

“It’s OK. Daddy’s here. Let it go. Trust me. It’s going to be OK. I’ve got it. Trust me.”

And with that he relaxed and let himself fall towards me. I lifted him out and he snuggled into my shoulder the whole way to his bed.

Thank you, Lord, for being my Daddy. Help me let go of my pretend struggles, trust you, and let you carry me home.

Because you are his sons and daughters, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, “Abba, Father.” – Galations 4:6

Who do you take your advice from?

I started listening to music at work to help drown out some of the background conversations. Searching through my music library, I realized again the influence that I place over myself with the music choices I make. I like listening to some of the same songs I liked in high shool and college. They remind me of some good times (like being with my wife). But I was also thinking, "Boy, I had a lot to learn. Would I take advice from myself in high school? Yikes!" And listening again to some of the songs that I used to like shows some of the false mentalities that raged against God's truth. Many in my music library were not Christian song writers, and I wonder now where their life has led them.

There are lots of suttle influences in our lives, and I think they influence us more than we think. I want you to remember that we also have more control over these influences than we think. God gives us this power to resist the World and seek the light of life, "for what do darkness and light have in common?"

One great question for figuring out if you are going along with the world or taking advice from the world:
"Does it give God glory?"

If not, don't do it.

So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. 
- First Corinthians 10:31

Extreme. Some might say. But Christianity is extremely opposite of the World. We like to label ourselves Christian, but then the definition slides to whatever our preferences are at the time. God's word keeps us on track.

Here are some of my thoughts on different things that do or could influence our lives:

Music - Has your preference changed since high school? Would you take advice from yourself in high school? Music connects to our soul. Use your intelligence to filter what goes to your soul. I now really appreciate the music of Koine and Branches Band. Now days there seems to be so many more options for different genres of Christian music. When I was growing up, it seemed like there were a couple groups that were kind-of-Christian that fit my music preference like DC Talk, Creed, and Jars of Clay. I still like Jesus Freak by DC Talk, but my kids were not impressed.

TV - #1 way to cut down on your intake of bad advice: Stop watching TV. If you watch, you are being influenced. For me, the only way I've found to regulate this negative influence is to not watch. It's addictive and I get sucked in, and the slide into poor programming is almost designed. You could DVR educational shows and fast forward through commercials, but that gets expensive. I just look up stuff on the internet instead (you also have to be careful there).

Internet - Tunnel vision is key. No side ad distraction. Write down what you went to your computer/phone for, then do it and get off. Our devices now days do more to distract us from reality than they do to improve our efficiency.

Parents - Have you really dived into the knowledge base that your parents have accumulated? What have they already done that you are now attempting to do? They did so much before you even existed. What were their experiences?

Siblings - Have you lost touch? Are you all busy with your own things? What are you both going through right now that is similar? Has an older sibling led the way with new experiences that you can learn from?

Mentors - Well, yeah, sure, but where do you find a mentor? Do you have to pay? Hard to find? Meet people, learn people. Find people that have what you want and just ask them for advice. Then do it! Take a moment and think about it. Write down a list of areas of your life that you find important. Then think of people you already know that have success in that particular area. Talk with them. Dig deep. Verify that they do indeed share your same values and goals. Then COPY! We don't have to figure out everything on our own. Be humble. Be willing.

Yourself - When I say, "I'm going to get a lot of stuff done at the house tonight." I put everything else under that task. I would much rather tell myself, "I'm going to be a great dad tonight, while I work on the house." That better matches up with my values, and puts the focus on the right task. Why hinder our eternal work with temporal work? How can I use my earthly work to help others (give them paid work or experience), to strengthen relationships (bonding time), to show the peace that God gives (maybe I should get that peace first). It's tough when you're hard up against a deadline, but if we seek these eternal things first, everything else may or may not work out, but at least we did the most important things first. God also promises that he will give us everything we need when we go to work, so don't worry. My experience has been that God delivers in remarkable ways when I set out to do a thing, but keep my priorities straight. Trust God and he will not let you down. He is good, all the time.

And that leads me to my last and most important item...

God - Take his advice. Read his word. He will speak with you. He will guide you in ways unseen. Your story is yours alone, and God knows it best. He will lead you to green pastures. To peace and security beyond your current understanding. All other advice pales in comparison.  

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,

    neither are your ways my ways,”

declares the Lord.

“As the heavens are higher than the earth,

    so are my ways higher than your ways

    and my thoughts than your thoughts."

-Isaiah 55:8-9

God's Word is Comforting

I just wasted 2.5 hours of my life, tossing and turning in bed, worrying about how I am going to fix our house. Leaking sink, ruined floors, ductwork, electrical…I couldn’t get it out of my head. I knew I needed to be sleeping. I had stayed up much later than is good for me. I need to get a lot done at work as well and I can’t function on 4 hours of sleep. I knew I needed to refocus on God. I started about 7 prayers during that 2.5 hours, and they all found their end in a wondering mind delved in house fixes. Finally, I asked forgiveness for my lack of focus, lack of trust, and asked God, “How can I not get distracted?” He answered pretty quick, “Read my Word.”

So at 5:30am, I got up, grabbed my Bible and a pen, and went to eat some breakfast.

There is something truly remarkable about the power of God’s word. It focused me immediately on God’s promises, Christ’s work, and how it applies to my life. I turned to Mark and just started looking over the headings, all stories I’ve read before, but it was powerful to see them written down. God recorded these events to help me, right now. I read the heading: The Request of James and John, and I think, “Wow. Those guys were pretty audacious, and way off base.” Then I turn to eat a spoon full of cereal, and I realize that I am not worthy to receive this food from God. I’m hungry, He feeds me, and I usually take it for granted. But now I see God, my loving Father, handing me, his audacious child, some food, because He knows I need it and He cares for me.

I read through that section again, and was struck again at how Jesus was a servant to all. And Jesus says it so clearly, “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” - Mark 10:45 

I knew the section about Do Not Worry. I was trying to tell myself the gist of it as I was tossing and turning in bed. But now I was equipped with God’s Word and His Spirit, so I turned to Matthew 6:25. It’s blatantly obvious to me now, after rereading this section, that God’s kingdom is what’s important and the work God gives us is to be done faithfully, to the best of our ability, and he will make sure we have all the tools we need. (we usually call them blessings) But more importantly, I have peace. My God gives me what I need.

My children have a pillow from a VBS years ago that reads, “God’s Word is Comforting”. Isn’t that the truth!

When the world distracts you, run to God’s Word.

“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” - John 14:27

For discussion - Does Jesus Deserve a Necktie?

I just wrote this quick as a comment to a Time of Grace article called: Does Jesus deserve a necktie?

I love the positive view of both dress styles. We have Christian freedom to worship God any way we choose, according to God's word. Appreciate the people that worship differently than you. Jesus gave us one basic command, "Love each other as I have loved you." When God's word takes a stand on an issue, we take a stand on an issue (with love). But when God's word is silent on an issue (like dress code), we mainly apply love. We do love our rules, don't we? But when someone starts a sentence with "You should...", it usually means you don't have to. We don't really have to do anything, but natural consequences and knowing the truth (especially the Truth of God's word) lead us to make better decisions. Some of the good decisions I've found are to avoid judging others by your own standards and actively look for ways to give God glory (which may include dressing up). We may also consider God's warning to "not cause anyone to stumble" by leading them into temptation. Use the Christian judgement that God has given you, and use God's word as a guide. That is why he has given us his word and Spirit. It's OK to change your mind too. Getting to know a wide spectrum of God's people shows me how God works with each person right where they are now in their spiritual journey. I don't want to ever criticize the work that God has done in their hearts, or destroy it through thoughtless words or hinder it with the shackles of "you should" (I seam to be continually working on that!).

I keep reminding myself:
Grace over Law.
Grace over Law.
Grace over Law.

Letting it go

I am very thankful for Time of Grace daily devotions. This latest devotion series is called Teach me to Pray.

Exactly what I needed to hear.

"Seeking God's righteousness means choosing to value your forgiveness of sins through the blood of Jesus as your most precious possession. When you have that, everything else that God thinks you need will come flowing into your life." April 11 (Based on Matthew 6:33)

"Every time you pray, you set something into motion. Every time you pray, something in the universe changes. You have never wasted a prayer in your life. Not a one falls to the ground unheard and unanswered. Your prayer talk makes you powerful and effective for God's work and your needs." April 12 (Based on James 5:16)

So April 12th I am humbled. I can't do it anymore, carrying the weight of it all. I take time to pray right after reading the devotion, right at my computer before getting ready for church. I don't remember what I said, but I remember laying it all out there. My sin, my honest assessment of my inability to achieve my desires, my misplaced priorities. Recognizing I am only one small part of God's master plan, but I am also incredibly thankful that He wants me to be a part of his plan. I let go. I stopped taking all responsibility for my results in life. I contented myself to be part of his plan, and to work faithfully with what I've been given.

On the way to church, a song reminded me how we are God's children. Jesus said, "Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.” Mark 10:15 I try to teach our children patience that I will provide. I try to teach them trust that everything will work out even if they don't see how it could be good for them. I try to give my children good things, but have to hold back because I see their hearts are not right to receive it. But it is absolutely awesome when our children simply trust that where we are going will be good. They hop in the car when we ask, and just go. Trusting. God wants me to trust him, just go with it. He's got it taken care of.

That same day, on the way back home from church, we saw an open house sign.

I had been pressuring myself to get our family out of an apartment and into "suitable" housing, while being fiscally responsible. A terrible burden in the Madison area. But now I had let it go.

We stopped on a whim. Expected what we've seen before: Nice house, but too much. Bad house, still too much. Ugly house, I want to take a shower after being inside.

We found a mediocre house. Definitely needs fixing up, but I think we can manage it. The land reminds me of home. Shows promise. The kids loved climbing on all the obstacles in the yard: hills, logs, and old foundations. We could have animals and a garden. We could show our children the value of hard work and the beauty of God's creation. God delivered an opportunity.

We researched, prayed, and slept on it. We compiled the offer on Monday. I did more research. We put in an offer this morning, I did more research, and we're waiting to hear back. I'm not sure if it's all going to work out financially, but I do know it's going to work out for our good. God is good. All the time.

Here is another big lesson I learned from the Monday devotion:

"When you pray, you are not filling out a grant request to a heavenly charitable foundation. You are talking to your Father. And he loves taking care of his children." April 13 (Based on Luke 11:1,2 and Matthew 6:9)

I often find myself trying to bargain with God like I know what is best and I just need to convince God to join my plan. How foolish! I find myself praying now, "Father, your will be done. Please glorify your name."

My selfishness still flares up more than I like to admit. But I hope I don't forget this awesome truth: It feels so good to be working for God...like we were made for it.

He has Risen!

He has risen!

Jesus said, "I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." - John 10:10

I don't know about you, but I feel like a new year's resolution. Maybe better termed "new creation resolution."

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come." - Second Corinthians 5:17

I want to speak less, listen more, and show my faith with patience and grace.

I don't know how Jesus did it. Not talking back to his false accusers. Not showing a glimpse of his blinding power to his enemies. He did it all for his Father's glory, and never deviated from the plan.

I want that raw humility.

We have been studying Philippians during our Sunday bible time, and these verses from chapter 2 come to mind,

"In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:

6 Who, being in very nature God,
    did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;
7 rather, he made himself nothing
    by taking the very nature of a servant,
    being made in human likeness.
8 And being found in appearance as a man,
    he humbled himself
    by becoming obedient to death—
        even death on a cross!
9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
    and gave him the name that is above every name,
10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
    in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
11 and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord,
    to the glory of God the Father."

He was a true servant, but he is my Lord and master, so what does that make me?

Jesus said, "I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. Very truly I tell you, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them." - John 13: 15-17

"So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, 'We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.'" - Luke 17:10

I want to be a servant because my Lord was the ultimate servant to me.

He has risen indeed!

How Rude!

So I get an email from UW-Platteville (my alma mater) saying they are preparing an alumni directory. They are going to post my current job title, address, and contact info; and I should call them to verify my information.

I'm thinking, "Great. One more thing to add to my list. They're always calling me for donations."

So on my way home from work, rushing to make it home in time to leave for our Lenten meal, I give 'em a call. I'm not even sure what this is for; I just want to make sure they don't say anything dumb.

I'm put on hold briefly before I speak with someone. Seams like a professional service they hired out to verify all their alumni records. I'm annoyed.

She asks, "How are you today?"

I give a cold, "Good." I resist adding the customary, "and how are you doing today?" to show the extent of my annoyance at this inconvenience in my life.

There was a brief pause where I'm sure she was expecting to respond with a chipper, "I'm doing well, thanks for asking."

I think to myself, "Wow, I'm kind of being a jerk. God doesn't want me to be this way." So I loosened up a bit. And I do mean a bit. I was still very matter a fact and straight to the point. She tried to sell me on buying a special anniversary ultra-custom shiny directory book for only two payments of $49.99, or the softcover version for $20 cheaper, or just a CD version for I don't know how much. I was done. I managed to say a fairly pleasant goodbye and ended the call.

During the conversation, she had said I could respond to an email to include a picture and a brief description of what I had been doing since graduation. I got the thought, "Hey. Maybe I can put a plug in for the pregnancy care ministry that I'm involved in...wait, I wasn't very Christ-like on that phone call. I wonder if she will read my description, and be like, 'Really? That guy was a Christian. He was a jerk on the phone.'"

I turned the corner. Almost home. I had to blurt out in prayer, "Oh God! I'm sorry for being a jerk. I have sinned against you. Forgive me."

It hurts to realize that I didn't just offend someone, but I had offended the God who put his only son through hell on earth to bring me safely home to heaven. I had been cold to my brother, Christ, who paid the total debt that I keep racking up throughout my life. I had pushed the Holy Spirit of my God out of my heart, and said to Him, "You wait outside while I take care of this my way."

What had I done? I failed to realize that another crown of God's creation, a fellow human being, was on the other end of that call. I forgot that I was a redeemed sinner who is happy to serve others without consideration of payback. I failed to remember that others do not have the same hope of heaven and joy of forgiveness that I have personally experienced through Christ.

That night I confessed my sin again to God in church, where He showed me a deeper understanding of my selfish sin earlier that day. I don't remember my exact words. It was one of those times where it feels like the Spirit takes over with groans that human words cannot express.

"And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God." - Philippians 1:9-11

Paul's prayer is my prayer.

Personal Faith

My wife and I are leading our oldest daughter through a study of Luther's small catechism. Part of the curriculum is writing your own personal confession of faith based on what we've learned about the Apostle's Creed. My wife read her's last night and I felt like sharing it with you. This is definitely what I believe about God through studying the bible. I think it is a very important step to own your faith. Go beyond the "I was raised..." and confidently declare, "I believe in..."  We each have specific stumbling points and specific doubts based on our personalities and backgrounds. Get them answered! Be confident in what you believe, because it will follow you in eternity. Each parent should help their children own their faith and give them the resources to get their questions answered. This is our God:

My Personal Confession of Faith Creed
by Katrina Nicolle Meinel, March 2015

I believe in the Triune God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit. He is omniscient (all-knowing), omnipresent (present everywhere) and omnipotent (all-powerful). God always was, always is, and always will be.

I believe the first person of The Trinity is the Father. As a Father, He created the whole world and provides for the whole world. As my Father, He gives me what I need and desire, and protects me. He does this because He created me and loves me. When His creation was ruined, He immediately promised a Savior.

I believe the second person of The Trinity is the Son, my Savior. This promised Savior came to earth as a baby, born of a virgin. Lived a perfect life, died the death I deserved to die, and was forsaken by the Father because of my sins. He descended into hell to proclaim His victory. He rose from the dead and ascended into heaven where He rules with all authority under the Father and prepares a mansion for me. And on the last day, when the trumpet sounds, He will raise the dead and take me and all believers to be with Him forever in heaven!

I believe the third person of The Trinity is the Spirit, the author and perfecter of my faith. He created my faith the day I was baptized
and strengthens my faith when I hear God’s Word and partake of the Lord’s Supper. He continually gives me strength to live the life of God’s child in service, gratitude and thankfulness to Him. All this I believe only by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Amen

Funeral

My family and I attended a funeral on Friday, March 13. Dawn Schwalbach, mother of 10 children, died of leukemia. She was a parenting and homeschooling mentor of ours. The service was two hours long. Started off with a hymn sing and a pastor opened the service, her six oldest children spoke, then her husband spoke. I was blown away by God's wonderful work on this family. Another pastor closed the service with a longer message and encouragement to the family. But it was the family themselves that said the most, that witnessed the most, that shone like stars.

Every person that spoke encouraged all those present to give their lives to God. Every child spoke about their mother, but in the context of God's grace and his work of salvation. I was humbled to be in their presence as God's glory was revealed in deep and personal ways.

I lost it when her husband, Jim, spoke. He told how things had not gone according to their plan, but how he was already seeing God's marvelous plan at work. She had gone down to Texas for treatment. He had gone down with her to get set up, but the plan was that he would go back home to Wisconsin. His flight was delayed a couple days. He was most thankful for those extra days. She had complications while he was back in Wisconsin. He was not able to make it to the hospital before she died. He blamed himself. His friend flew down to give him strength and encouragement. He was shattered. 

While Jim was following their plan (staying back in WI), his long-term alcoholic brother called him for help. He never calls for help. He got a flat tire. Jim and Dawn had been helping him for many years and sharing their faith in Jesus Christ as the only way. That day that Jim met him on the road, he stopped resisting God. He believed that God had saved even him, and he prayed that God would use whatever is left of him, for His glory. He died of detox the day before Dawn died. His funeral was the next day. 

This family has gone through a lot, and they keep shining as God's children, ever pointing to the One who makes them whole. 

When we went through the reception line, Jim gave us a marriage book and encouraged us in our homeschooling. Wow. He's still thinking about giving to others, when he feels like half of his heart has been amputated.

What's wrong with me? How can I be like that?

They all said the same thing. Commit yourself to Christ. Let him be your Lord and Savior.

I want to remember these quotes:
"Remember, we're not homeschooling them for their 'academics', we're homeschooling them for their souls."

"Others speak their salvation, she lived her salvation."

"She always took the time to listen."

"Running errands, she asked me if I was embarrassed to be 'Mom's little helper' - like anyone could be embarrassed to be around her."

"There wasn't a phony bone in her body."

"She would be mad at me if I didn't tell you...Jesus died for you."