You Complete Me

So I am reading Gary Smalley’s The DNA of Relationships. Right in the middle of his discussion on taking personal responsibility, he brings up certain lies about relationships that people believe. A popular one is “You complete me” (think Jerry Maguire here). This sounds good on the surface, especially with emotional music in the background. But this is the old compromise relationship, the old 50/50, the old miserable relationship because we expect the other person to hold up their end of the bargain. We also take it upon ourselves to let them know when we notice them slipping. This is a horrible relationship, cold, contractual; there is no room for love to flourish here. And on page 52 in Chapter three, Gary asks this question, “In your experience, do two unhappy people normally form one happy couple?” I think we all have to agree, not usually.

This sent a light bulb moment to my brain, and I immediately sent out a tweet with Gary’s question and added, “Don’t expect your spouse to complete you. Only God can do that.” 

Then, this morning I get an email from Pastor Jeske entitled “Love Your Singleness” The two sources fit well together, and I was quite impressed with the timing (sometimes God has to make things real obvious for me). So I hope you read both Gary’s book and Pastor Jeske’s Grace Moment, and understand better the power of God in our relationships.