Fidgeting

Thinking about fidget toys this morning...In theory, I am apposed to the use of fidgets, but when I sit down at my computer and start thinking about all the engineering problems I need to solve, I reach for something. I fiddle with my pen, I grab a snack from my lunch, I check my phone...why?

I think that I am looking for comfort.

That may seem odd when you think about the types of things you find yourself fidgeting with, but I think there might be a connection.

I look for other things that I can control when I'm facing a problem that I do not yet have in control. The small thing, the small easy task gives me comfort, makes me believe I can tackle the big challenge in front of me.

What if God was my fidget?

What if whenever I was faced with a big challenge outside of my immediate control, I reached for God? Not as something that I could easily manipulate, but as the Almighty Everlasting Loving Father that comes up along side of me, puts His hand on my shoulder, and says, "Now what are you working on here, son? Need any help?". Instead of pushing His hand away, and saying, "No. I got this. You'll see." - or worse, not even acknowledging His presence - what if I just took the time to answer Him with, "Hey Dad! I'm glad you're here. I could really use some help figuring this one out. You see, here's the problem, I've got...".

Now that's comforting. A lot more comforting than that donut I'm scarfing down as I'm staring at my computer screen...that I know is going to have negative impacts on my health.

What if I enjoyed working along side of Him, knowing that everything is going to turn out great with Him there - even if sometimes it looks like I've really screwed it up? He is patient, and he likes to see me learn. He made me this way, and He enjoys working with me. Maybe I should just let Him.